Flashback Friday

I spent most of my pregnancy afraid. Afraid that I would miscarry. Afraid that the placentas would detach. Afraid that one twin would die. Afraid of cord complications. Afraid of stillbirth. Afraid to tell people for fear of having to then explain a loss. Afraid that after growing to love these babies, my body would once again let me down.

It's why I waited over four months to tell my students (they already knew...I was showing and the entire grade eleven class was talking), why K2 had to push me into buying the requisite baby gear mere weeks before they were born and why I kept it quiet from the blog world for so long.

To help me with the ongoing worry, we bought a fetal heart doppler. Having the doppler meant that I could check on the babies' heartbeats whenever I felt anxiety creeping in. Once the babies were big enough to be kicking me in the ribs, I used it less frequently, but in that space of time between ultrasounds I was calmed by hearing their heartbeats.

Today's "Flashback Friday" is a video we took of the very first time we used the doppler to find the heartbeats. It was a moment we will never forget for the rest of our lives.

Flashback Friday from Two Kayaks on Vimeo.