Lessons

There are three distinct lessons I've learned in the last 15-20 years that influence my parenting. Obviously, there are many more I've learned along the way, but three have struck a poignant chord in me.

While in high school, I worked as a cashier at Woolco. Yes, I'm that old. Before there was Walmart, there was Woolco. The Christmas season was always met with some disdain by cashiers because of what the pressures of the season did to otherwise pleasant people.  Or, maybe the pressures of the season revealed the true characters of people.  Yes, I believe that to be the case.  I saw a lot of people come through my aisle, but I'll never forget this particular December day in which the last two customers in the store were lined up to come through my till.

The first family looked as though they were quite well-off - dressed to the nines and buying expensive wares.  While I know one sometimes can't make judgments based on clothing and purchases, I could tell that money was not an object to this family.  The thing was, they were completely unhappy.  The parents were rude to the kids, the kids were sassy to the parents and the way they all spoke to each other made me cringe.  They loaded up the conveyor belt with hundreds of dollars worth of gifts and merchandise, whipped out a credit card, paid for it all, then left without so much as a "Happy Holidays" in return for my wishes for them.

The second family looked as though they were struggling financially.  The kids (four little girls) were dressed in worn pink bombers, the parents were dressed very modestly, and there were only a few inexpensive items on the conveyor to be purchased.  This family was so wrapped up in talking about what they were seeing around the store, laughing and talking sweetly to each other, that they barely noticed when I was ready to take their cash.  They paid for their wares, wished me a Merry Christmas, and were on their way.  The dad hoisted up the littlest of the girls over his shoulder as she screeched in feigned protest then giggled as she relented.

I realize that having a lot of money does not necessarily mean that people are unhappy and I understand that not every family who struggles with finances is happy.  What I do know is that mutual respect and gratitude are essential for happiness. Regardless of circumstance, seeing the forest for the trees makes all the difference where security, satisfaction and happiness are concerned.

Two more lessons next.